Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Men, She's Gone to Battle for You!

Mother's day is around the corner. Just like Valentine's Day I don't need a gift. My favorite gift is a nice beautiful day outside with my children. Even though yes this is typically a day for children to recognize their mothers I'd like to take a moment to remind men about recognizing the mother of their children.

Men, that woman has gone to battle for you! And she has the battle scars to prove it. You know those precious sometimes sweet children that you love more than anything most days. Well carrying them for nine months, hours of labor, the not so pretty mess of birthing a child, the aching breasts, the cracked nipples, the healing cuts of c sections or tears is no easy or pleasant task.

It's weeks sometimes months of hugging the porcelain throne, it's a literal pain in the ass like no other from that damn sciatica nerve, it's packing around a solid 25+ pounds around your midsection morning and night with no way of just unloading that extra weight at the end of a long day. It's hours upon hours of labor that feels like a cross between period hell or the worst case of diarrhea pains you've ever had. Then when she finally gets to relieve herself of that extra 25+ lbs pounds and those excruciating worst period ever pains it's to only have a 6-9 lb baby either ripped out of her midsection or shot out of her delicate lady parts that will probably never be the same now thanks to you. Then there's the after part and no I'm not talking about all that other stuff that comes out of there. I'm talking about the pain down there that first requires her to walk around with a giant ice pack in those wonderful hospital granny panties they supply but then there's the not so pleasant weeks of recovery from having herself sewed back together. The battle is possibly not over for her though if she decides to nurse your precious off spring. Now she will continue this parenthood battle with huge aching breasts that resemble water balloons that just won't ever pop and as if the stretch marks and stitched lady parts aren't enough battle wounds she'll now carry the wound of cracked and even sometimes bleeding nipples. She's a warrior!  Okay, maybe she did some of this for herself and those precious offspring that she'll claim as her own as well, but hey she did it for you somewhat too.

That mother of your children has gone to battle for you, man, sometimes not once but twice or even three or four times. As my husband says she gave you a damn good return on that deposit you made so you better make sure you thank her for it this Mother's Day.



  1. Lol! Miss Angela, you must have had a day! This is very funny! Seriously, you look wonderful and I love seeing the girls with your precious new addition! Xoxox!

    1. Thanks. It was a good day but some of the after effects shall we say was annoying me earlier so thought I'd bring a little overdue humor back to the blog. Thanks for reading.