Saturday, July 9, 2016

To Stay or To Go..If It's a Choice

I have to hash some things out in my head so forgive this post for being more all over the place than normal.

My husband back during the week our son was born interviewed to get into our school district's administration pool and he did! Which is great because he's been working towards this for two + years if you add in the years of grad school on top of the past two. However it's a big pool even for as big of a school district we are. Just recently they've posted a few openings that wouldn't be too bad of a commute for him so even though the process is just beginning we've already been talking plan B if he doesn't get an administration job within the next three summers. Rather than reapplying to get into the pool at the end of this two half year window he says we'll move.  Because of where we live on the MD/PA line there are minimal other options from here other than our current district. Other options would require us to move which we're not against. In fact we've even talked about how if he got a year or two of admin experience how we'd still possibly consider relocating.

Here's where I find myself stuck. Luckily right now he's currently in a great position as a Title I coordinator already doing lots of admin work just without the pay so he's willing to wait his way through this process for the next two school years. On one hand I would love the opportunity to relocate and experience a new place but on the other I fear and dread the work that I KNOW firsthand that goes into starting over. We have a good thing here and we know it, but we've also never stayed in the same area for longer than 6.5 years (we've lived in small town Missouri, bigger city Kansas, the hustle and bustle of DC, the appeals of city life in Baltimore, and back to smalltown America in northern Maryland in the twelve years we've been together) and there's something appealing about moving around and experiencing different environments. The appeal of city life verse country life fascinates me. The difference between East Coast life and Midwest life fascinates me. I love it all and to forever commit to one is a little more difficult for us than I thought it would be. For us to reconsider later a year or two from now when it's time to decide if we're going or staying  here are my whys or pros and cons of each.

Let's start with the cons of relocating:

-If out of state the potential setback to our retirement and pension goals
-Loss of tenureship and seniority
-loss of money/income and benefits (as based on what I know from friends in other states MD is one of the best for teachers pay and benefits)
-the process of selling our house and moving in general
-leaving all the friends we made here

The pros of relocating:

-would LOVE the experience of a new area of the US or the state of Maryland (Eastern Shore)
-think teaching my kids to adapt to change and not fear change is a valuable experience
-new friends, new relationships
-possibly closer to our families (but could be farther too)
-newer closer vacation places to explore
-the chance to work where we raise our family (it's very unlikely we'll ever work in the same community we're raising our kids in right now)

We toss this idea around about every year or two so I know there's a part of us that really wants to pack it up and go. Go experience living life somewhere else. It's such a big fascinating world out there to see and as he reminds me we only have one life to live. So why not spend that life experiencing as many different places as possible. Why stay strapped to the same place for your whole life?

Yet there's also that part that says we have a good thing here. We put a lot of work and effort into building a life here on our own, and we've just in the last year got to place professionally, financially, and personally with our marriage/family goals that we've spent years working towards. How good of an idea is it to leave it behind and start over again? We'd give up a lot of things here and there's always the question of if the risk is worth it?

Five years tops is the deciding moment. Our oldest will be almost a teenager and in middle school and the baby will be starting kindergarten. If we're staying we'll look to buy THE house, the forever home, the dream house. Once we buy that we're here for good even through retirement. I'll be honest I don't know if I want to shackle myself to one place forever, but I also don't like the idea of leaving all the great things we have here behind.

Luckily the decision is for another day and depending on how the job hope goes in the admin pool it may not even be much of a choice. Guess we'll all just have to wait and see.

                  I'll go with the beach picture because one of the things we've discussed is if we're going to pack it all and start over let's do it closer to the beach

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