I was watching my girls play with two of their little friends today. I can't remember which one did what but one of them in fun dumped water over something of the other one's. The other one immediately called her out on it, telling her not to do that and letting her know it made it her mad. Less than sixty seconds later they were right back to playing.
I looked at my grandmother and out loud wondered why don't grown women disagree that way. I think it would be so much more productive. Instead we play these pretend games, we put on the fake mask, and when someone pisses us off instead of just calling them on it or talking to them about it, we'd much rather talk behind their back, ignore them or give them the cold shoulder, and play these superficial games.
I know our mothers taught us play nice but does playing nice at some point as we grow up translate to be nice to their face but mean to them behind their back. Do we think that's a nice way of going about things? I don't know about you but I would much rather someone just tell me to my face what the problem is. I grew up with two sisters and a cousin that we referred to as the fourth sister so the four of us were pretty good at just telling it like it is to each other. To this day I still trust that they'll give it to me straight. Does it hurt my feelings sometimes. Sure, but I've also experienced dealing with girls or should I say women that are suppose to be my friends that are nice to my face but are nasty (don't just mean the friendly jesting either) behind my back. I move past my hurt feelings just as quick as those little girls today when my friends that I know are my true friends tell me like it is, but all that behind the back crap just leads to whole pile of drama that builds a lot of resentment and untrustworthy relationships. Then you become what I call frenemies, not real friends.
So, ladies, because men don't seem to get hung up on all this fake, behind the back crap that women do, maybe we could learn a little something from that next little kid disagreement.
The four of us with our mini me.
.Check out my book about motherhood and family in our 21st Century digital world. Get the ebook here or purchase a copy of the print version here.
I would love to sell five books today to get halfway to my June goal
No comments:
Post a Comment