Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Team: You are Theirs and They are Yours

You know that feeling where your stomach is all in knots. Your palms are sweating. Your heart is beating a little faster. You're excited but scared. You're excited for the possibilities but scared of failing or not winning.

That's the way I felt when it came to sharing my writing. It was like the big moment before stepping onto the field of the big game. The spectators are anxiously waiting to see what you'll do, ready to cheer you on and pat you on the back whether you win or lose. There are always some though that want to focus on all the wrong ways you played the game and some that will point out all your mistakes rather than the things you did well.

But then you step out onto that field and you remember you're not alone. Sure, you have your moments where it's your turn to bat, your turn to make the play, but it takes a team to win and to lose. It takes a team to work together for the best results. Just as the pitcher can't win the game by herself without the team, none of us will succeed without the team of support that surrounds us.

There's unity that comes with team.  So no matter the fear that causes your heart to race, your palms to sweat, and your stomach to knot, there's a sense of belonging. You are theirs and they are yours.

Fear is such an interesting thing. Sure we all have our fear list. I fear heights, rollercoasters, and even though I can handle spiders and even snakes (as long as they're not trying to kill me) I fear mice for some strange reason. These are all concrete fears, but then there's the fear of the abstract things. There's the fear of loss, the fear of failure, the fear of rejection. When we have to face those concrete fears we will possibly experience a brief moment of intense emotion or even irrational fear, but the moment will pass and as we move on we will forget about it. But abstract fear doesn't leave you in a moment. It stays with us and in many ways it defines us.

In honesty I have done little to conquer my fear of heights, rollercoasters, or even mice. But I am well aware of my fear of those abstract things. I see the fear in myself as well as others. We hold ourselves back, we don't try, we don't move towards change because we fear the unknown, the judgments, the criticisms, the feeling of rejection.

This is where I found myself when it came to point on whether to follow through with publishing my writing. Did I want to step up to bat? Did I want to volunteer to be the pitcher of the game? So many would be watching me. Some on my side would be wringing their hands as they hoped for the best; others would silently be standing aside hoping I'd strike out so they could say I told you so. Even though I started writing as an outlet at the age of ten, I hid it for years for fear of rejection, ridicule, judgment. At ten I didn't know writing or not writing there really was no escaping of judgment or rejection. So many of us fear it because it's impossible to avoid. We will all feel judged, and we will all feel rejected at some point. That is the fear I was determine to conquer.

So just like the big game with the sweaty palms, racing heart, and knotted stomach, I told myself to just buck up and take the mound. Because you see I wasn't standing out there alone. I had a team. I had a team that believed in me; I had a team that had my back. We were going to do this together. In so many different ways they inspired me to be a better me than I was yesterday. I wanted to give it my best shot for them. I was theirs and they were mine.

I stepped on this field to play for them and so whatever I can give will be more than if I was too scared to take the field.  They rallied with me and together we'll give it our best shot. My dad always had this saying, sometimes you are going to strike out, it happens, and that's okay. But always go down swinging!

             Have you bought your copy of Moms, Monsters, Media & Margaritas. 20% of sales are going towards the I ROK Foundation for childhood cancer. I d love to see about 30 copies sell tonight to get us around a quarter of the way to our goal for the I ROK Foundation.

The ebook for ibookstore is now avaliable for only $4.99 so save yourself $5 +shipping and I ROK still gets the same $$ amount as the print version! Get the ebook here

Last night's release post

Book Release with 20% of this summer's sales to childhood cancer charity

1 comment:

  1. This is an awesome post. Your comment on my blog reminded me that a need to get caught up on your posts. :) Where do the days go?